so, i had a baby.

Last Thursday, Sullivan Joshua was born! Despite having to be induced (again), which I really wanted to avoid, it was such an awesome, exciting, great birth experience (again). I am so thankful for that. This time around, we hired a doula, and I am so glad we did...She was beyond helpful and a great advocate for me. (If it weren't for her, the hospital may have been short one nursing staff member come the end of the day.)

I did so much better with pain management during this labor. Actually, it just occurred to me that last time I was given pain meds through my IV and this time, though I did request them at one point, I made it up until my epidural without them. So that's kinda cool or something.

It was a very intense, crazy labor. (Aren't they all?) I was induced at 7:51 a.m. 

Sullivan was born at 2:41 p.m.

Things started off "easy" enough, but very quickly (thanks, pitocin!) escalated to not so easy.

I was able to try lots of different positions, even though I had to be monitored the whole time, and even though we had to fight the nurse a bit...That was a huge help.

Last time, I didn't really try to move around much, so I didn't experience any flack...I kind of think I wouldn't have, anyway, because this nurse was much more...strict, than any of the others there. But it was really frustrating to actually experience someone fighting me on my natural instincts. I mean, you hear about it (typically from midwives/doulas/"those people"), and I think some people think these people are just overdramatic and silly, but I experienced it firsthand and it sucks.

BUT! I obviously do not think all nurses/doctors are this way. The rest of the nurses we encountered this day were amazing and very helpful in this area, too. Thankful that not everyone thought I was a crazy/irrational person that day!

Time is weird when you're in labor, I think. Everything is hazy to me, looking back. I remember a couple of things, but the rest is kind of like...How did we get from there to here? Huh. 

It's a weird thing where the day is fast and slow at the exact same time. 

I remember hitting Josh at one point. (I'm a cliche!) 

I don't remember when I gave up caring who saw what. But, oh...it happened. (Yikes.)

I remember how relieved I was when I got my epidural.

And then how nervous I was, after, that it would stall things or lead to a c-section.

Thankfully, it did neither.

The epidural didn't 100% take, so I still felt my contractions a bit...and about an hour after receiving the epidural, I could tell Sullivan was trying to make his way out.

I told my doula...she told the nurses...they checked and, "You're ready!"

I cried. I remember when I started crying, thinking, "This feels like a weird time to cry." But I was just beyond relieved and excited.

It was cool that I still got to feel stuff a bit. I didn't really have that with Tatum's birth...I still felt like an active participant, but this time I was way more physically aware of what was happening.

I will spare you the actual birth photos this time, because we unfortunately didn't get any good ones. (My pushing face is hilarious, but the world probably just isn't ready for it.) In fact, the one picture I really wanted (me "catching" him) was ruined in the stupidest way ever. (You can see everything, except for my face, because someone stepped in front of the camera.) It's kind of funny, but still sucks.

And, of course, my doctor forced Josh to cut the cord again (His favorite!) and take a picture of the placenta. (Super sorry you guys have to miss out on that photo, too. Bummer.) My doctor is weird and awesome. : )

 

Some may remember that Sullivan's full name was originally "Sullivan Drew Kassinger." I had been thinking in the days leading up to his birth that I just wasn't sure about it. It just didn't feel totally "special" to me. But I couldn't think of anything to use instead, so even in the hospital when they asked, I said that his name was "Sullivan Drew." Then, when it came time to fill out the birth certificate, the perfect name dawned on me..."Sullivan Joshua."
What could be more special than him being named after my other most favorite guy on the planet? I loved it immediately.
Josh had no idea...He wasn't at the hospital. But I figured he'd be okay with it, ha. He always says that he doesn't care about middle names, so I was pretty free to choose on my own...I think he is pretty happy with this decision, though.
I think it fits so much better!

There is so much more to say, but I will save those thoughts for future posts. Thanks for reading! : )