some things i know of and others will be surprises along the way.
i'm super excited for this year and everything in store.
and i'm especially excited for some changes that i'm making happen on my own along the way.
over the course of the year, i'm sure my list will develop, grow, and change...but here are a few things i'm looking at right now:
this one is really big and important for me. here's a little secret and something i'm pretty embarrassed to share, but it has to be done...i haven't worked out regularly since my freshman year of high school. i always get into these kicks where i want to change, want to be different...but then i just backslide.
i've also gone into really weird, depressive cycles with my body. which i guess is probably normal for most girls, but i've done things that just weren't smart. i've gone through times where i was obsessed with "thinspo" and all that trash. i don't want to ever deal with that again. i'm better than that; we all are! i want to start loving me for me and treating myself with love.
i'm ready for this to change. in the past, i haven't felt like i really had any motivation, but this time around i really think it will be different. my best friend and i are going to start working out together, so i have someone alongside, pushing me.
also, my health isn't where it should be. i'm such a young girl living in what sometimes feels like an old lady's body. it's time to kick this, and i couldn't be more ready.
2. GETTING GIRLY.
when i was in high school, it was always really important to me to take some time to look nice everyday. (not in a shallow way.) i just felt that it was important to present myself nicely. since high school ended, i barely ever even care.
i've never been the type to just wear sweats to class, but i don't really carve time out to get ready and look nice these days.
sometimes i don't do anything as far as "getting ready" before i go to work or school. i'm getting pretty bored with this.
josh says that it seems like i'm much more confident and excited when i do get ready and dressed up, also. so i think that will definitely help me on the road to feeling better about myself.
3. NO MORE NEGATIVITY.
this one has been a toughy for me. i feel like i'm just surrounded by so much negative. it's starting to gross me out!
one of my main problem areas is my workplace and my coworkers. i know i have complained about them a lot. and that seems like a big sign to me that i should probably move on from this place. everyday, i dread going to work. when i get there, i'm usually so depressed my people's moods. most of the people there are so catty and there is always drama.
working there is like a really dramatic high school, but with old people. (ha.)
so, i'm going to work really hard to find a new job. i just think it's definitely time to move on and find a better fit; somewhere that doesn't make me want to come home and cry or pull my hair out...every single day...
4. STOP SWEATING SMALL STUFF.
for whatever reason, really small stupid things can get the best of me so hard. i know everyone has pet peeves, but i think i take it to an extreme. it has made me hate so many little things that people do, and in turn made me very critical of them.
i just don't want to be that person anymore. it's getting in the way of my happiness and relationships with certain people.
5. BETTER RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE 'RENTS.
i have a really hard time getting along with my parents, especially my dad. sometimes it's me, sometimes it's them. regardless, i really want to work on our relationship, and find better ways of handling situations. i want to be friends with them and get to know them.
those are just a few things.
i'm really excited for what lies ahead; growing, learning, living, becoming a better me.
and i'm also really excited for what lies ahead for all of you, and i can't wait to experience your journeys with you, and you with me.